NINE STEPS TO FORGIVENESS

Dr. Fred Luskin: Nine Steps to Forgiveness.

Retrieved from: http://learningtoforgive.com/9-steps

 

1. Know exactly how you feel about what happened and be able to articulate what about the situation is not OK. Then, tell a couple of trusted people about your experience.

2. Make a commitment to yourself to feel better. Forgiveness is for you and no one else.

3. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciling with the person who upset you or condoning the action. In forgiveness you seek the peace and understanding that come from blaming people less after they offend you and taking those offenses less personally.

4. Get the right perspective on what is happening. Recognize that your primary distress is coming from the hurt feelings, thoughts, and physical upset you are suffering now, not from what offended you or hurt you.

5. At the moment you feel upset, practice stress management to soothe your body’s fight or flight response.

6. Give up expecting things from your life or from other people that they do not choose to give you. Remind yourself that you can hope for health, love, friendship, and prosperity, and work hard to get them. However, these are “unenforceable rules:” You will suffer when you demand that these things occur, since you do not have the power to make them happen.

7. Put your energy into looking for another way to get your positive goals met than through the experience that has hurt you.

8. Remember that a life well lived is your best revenge. Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings, and thereby giving power over you to the person who caused you pain, learn to look for the love, beauty, and kindness around you. Put more energy into appreciating what you have rather than attending to what you do not have.

9. Amend the way you look at your past so you remind yourself of your heroic choice to forgive.


PERSONAL FORGIVENESS CONTRACT
Click Here To View Contract


ARTICLES, REPORTS & WEBSITES

Journal Articles
Can Christian Divorce Support Groups Influence Forgiveness and Health Outcomes in Black Divorcees: A Phenomenological Investigation. Saunders, M., Curtis, D., Alexander, A., & Williams, E. (2013). Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 54 (7). 550-575.
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/272123208_Can_Christian_Divorce_
Support_
Groups_Influence_Forgiveness_and_Health_Outcomes_in_Black_Divorcees_A_
Phenomenological_
Investigation

Reports
CDC's African American Health Report 2017. Retrieved from
https://www.cdc.gov/vitalsigns/aahealth/index.html

Endless Grace: The Story of Forgiveness. Retrieved from
http://www.peacepoint.com/endless-grace-a-story-of-forgiveness

Global Forgiveness Initiative. Retrieved from:
http://globalforgivenessinitiative.com/

International Forgiveness Institute. Retrieved from:
https://internationalforgiveness.com/

International Forgiveness Day. Retrieved from:
https://www.cute-calendar.com/event/international-forgiveness-day/25805.html

Heartland Forgiveness Scale. Retrieved from
https://www.heartlandforgiveness.com/take-the-hfs

Transgression Related Interpersonal Motivation Inventory
https://www.midss.org/transgression-related-interpersonal-motivations-inventory-trim-18

The Power of Forgiveness. Retrieved from:
http://www.crosswalk.com/faith/prayer/the-power-of-forgiveness.html

A Campaign for Forgiveness Research. Retrieved from:
http://www.forgiving.org/default.asp

What Forgiveness Means: Retrieved from:
http://www.evworthington-forgiveness.com/research/

Worldwide Forgiveness Alliance. Retrieved from:
http://forgivenessalliance.org/index.php

REACH Forgiveness Resources
http://www.evworthington-forgiveness.com/reach-resources

How racism makes us sick. Dr. David Williams. Retrieved from:
http://www.tedmed.com/talks/show?id=621421

Girlhood Interrupted: The Erasure of Black Girls’ Childhood. Retrieved from:
https://www.napequity.org/blog/girlhood-interrupted-erasure-black-girls-childhood/

New Psychology Study finds Adverse Childhood Experiences Transfer from One Generation to the Next. Heath McCoy. Retrieved from:
https://medicalxpress.com/news/2017-06-psychology-adverse-childhood.html
 

 
 
 
 
 

Media & Public R​elations

 
 
 
 
 
  Blog Radio Interview on Forgiveness

What is Etiquette Anyway: The Issue of Forgiveness?

https://www.blogtalkradio.com/etiquette-lady/2019/09/08/what-is-etiquette-anyway
 

 
   
  Radio Interview on LA Talk Show with Mother Love - 11/7/14

Listen:
http://www.latalkradio.com/Players/Motherlove.shtml?date=November+7,+2014&file=110714
 
   
 
  Voyage Atlanta Interview: Meet Dr. Magon Saunders, Forgive for Health Ministries
https://voyageatl.com/interview/community-highlights-meet-magon-saunders-of-forgive-for-health-ministries-inc/

 
   
     
 
     
     
  Grant 01  
 
 
 
 

Grant 02

 
 

 
 
 

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